Recognition
Couples therapy might be right for you if
- You've tried so many different ways of approaching the same conflict, but it ends up feeling the same.
- You find yourselves avoiding each other altogether in order to avoid conflict, and that distance is becoming harder to ignore.
- One or both partners may be managing their own mental health and that is affecting the dynamic.
- A life transition - new baby, new job, new house, moved to a new location - has been way harder than expected.
- You find yourselves arguing about whose turn it is to load the dishwasher, and 10 minutes later you're rehashing 10 other grievances to the point where neither of you can remember how this even started.
- The marriage has drifted uncomfortably close to feeling more like roommates and one or both of you is scared to name that elephant in the room.
- Sex and intimacy change over the course of a marriage, and you're having trouble navigating that.
- You're both exhausted, but you're committed to finding time and new ways to invest in the relationship.
When it works
When couples therapy is effective
- You'll learn more about yourselves and each other - and how and why interactions might be going the way they do.
- You'll develop concrete communication and conflict resolution strategies.
- You'll learn how much better communication works when you are both engaging openly and proactively rather than relying on mind-reading, assumptions, or avoidance.
- You will build new ways of connecting and understand that intimacy is not just about sex.
- You might even remember that you do not just love each other - you do in fact like each other.
- You will strengthen your relationship by aligning on the goal of "getting back to us."
Process
How couples therapy works
We start with a 90-minute assessment where you each fill out an individual and couples questionnaire to help me get to know you. During that initial assessment I will talk with you as a couple and as individuals as we talk about what's working, where you're struggling, and what you'd both like to see change.
From there, we work in the standard 50-minute clinical hour to address the goals that we all agree to during the assessment. Some couples come in to work on a specific issue. Some maintain a relationship with me and come back regularly for “check-ins” and maintenance work as part of their ongoing commitment to each other.
I use a Gottman-informed practice that combines both concrete communication and conflict resolution skills, along with an interpersonal style that encourages both of you to work from the same side of the table to resolve outstanding issues and build on prior successes.
Structure
What the format looks like
- 90-minute Initial Assessment
- 50-minute standard sessions
- All delivered through secure, HIPAA-compliant telehealth
- Licensed Psychologist in Maryland and New York
- 43 telehealth states
Orientation
This is not about picking a winner.
The work is most effective when both of you are willing to look at the pattern together, name what is not working, and practice something more useful in real time.
Goal
Get back to each other.
The point is not a more polished argument. The point is to interrupt the old loop and build a relationship that feels more collaborative, more connected, and less exhausting.
Ready to get started?
A free 15-minute consultation is enough to tell if this is a fit. No pressure, no commitment.